


Paranormal Stupidity

by JackRaiser



Category: Invader Zim
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-06
Updated: 2020-10-06
Packaged: 2021-03-07 16:47:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,830
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26860879
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JackRaiser/pseuds/JackRaiser
Summary: EASTER EGGS AND REFERENCES:-Paranormal Stupidity: An obvious reference to the Paranormal Activity movies, which inspired the story as well.-"I have the body of a pig": Reference to a famous internet video of an alleged real ghost.
Kudos: 2





	Paranormal Stupidity

Zim's in his base talking to the tallest.  
ZIM: On my last battle with the filthy human Dib I managed to steal certain artifacts from him.  
The Tallest are tired and bored.  
TALLEST RED: That's great Zim, look we go...  
ZIM: As you can see I have in my posession a large number of strange devices I've yet to find out  
what they're for.  
TALLEST RED: That's GREAT Zim but we need to...  
ZIM: But I'm confident that one of these can be used to finally destroy the DIB! Imagine that, destroyed by  
his own equipment! I'M A GENIUS!!  
The tallest facepalm.  
TALLEST RED: Well Zim we'd like to stay and chat but uh..., uh... WE'RE UNDER ATTACK!!! DEFENSIVE MODE!!!  
TALLEST PURPLE: No we're not...  
The tallest red pushes purple away.  
TALLEST RED: GET IN POSITION EVERYBODY NOW!!!  
The transmission gets cut.  
TALLEST RED & PURPLE: Phew...  
IRKEN PILOT: My tallest! We're under attack!!  
TALLEST PURPLE: Hey, we've already cut the transmission with Zim. No need to keep up with the act.  
Both tallest laugh.  
IRKEN PILOT: But my tallest...!!  
ZIM: My tallest? My tallest!?  
Gir bumps into Zim. He has a camera and films everything.  
GIR: Look what I have!  
ZIM: Where did you get that?  
GIR: I found it.  
Flashback:  
Gir is coming back from buying groceries all happy and dandy. In the way home he stumbles upon a guy filming his house from the outside. The guy is actually making an amateur voyeur porno.  
SOME DUDE: Ok now, now do what I said. That's the good stuff.  
Gir bumps into the guy, and this one turns to him. Gir just looks at him and takes his camera and walks away as if nothing happened. The guy just stays there confused.  
End of flashback.  
ZIM: Get that outta my face!!  
GIR: I like it.  
Gir goes running around filming everything.  
Zim puts a box he stole from Dib in front of him and opens it.  
It's a ball with some satanic-like symbols all over it. Gir gets close to it and films it.  
GIR: Oooooooooohhhhh!  
ZIM: Get way Gir! We don't know what this could unleash.  
Gir: Ooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhh!  
Gir zooms in and zooms out the camera when looking at the ball until he zooms in too much and the len hits the ball.  
The ball then breaks and a flying black thing comes out quickly and turns intro three other same looking thing. It's one demon only actually. The things go and disappear around the base.  
ZIM: GIR!! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE!!  
GIR: I opened the bally... thingy!  
ZIM: What was that thing? Some kind of flying being...  
GIR: It went woooosh!  
ZIM: Computer! Look for any anomalies around the base.  
The computer doesn't answer.  
ZIM: Computer!! I said look for any anomalies around the base!!!  
Again, the computer won't answer.  
ZIM: What's going on with you?!  
COMPUTER: RRAAAARRGGHHHHAAAAGRRRR!!!  
ZIM: HUH!?! What was that?!!  
GIR: I heard it! It went ROOOOARRGHHHEEEEEEEGHHHH!!  
ZIM: Shut up Gir! I'm trying to find out what's wrong with the computer.  
Zim checks on the computer but nothing happens. The computer is dead.  
ZIM: Could it be that that thing you released is interfering with my base somehow?  
A sudden blackout happens.  
Zim has a look of surprise and confusion while Gir only looks confused but curious.  
ZIM: HUH!!!!?? What the...!!??  
GIR: Are we having a partyyyyyyyyy!!??  
ZIM: Shut up Gir! I have to find out what's happening.  
A horrible demonic scream can be heard from the levels above.  
ENTITY: NNNHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRGGGHHHHH!!  
Zim gets spooked.  
ZIM: That thing is gonna destroy my entire base if I don't do something about it!  
Gir annoys Zim with the camera len zooming in, zooming out.  
ZIM: First I need to get to the core of the base to fix the power again. Come along Gir!  
Zim and Gir go the core of the base by jumping from the elevator hole and Zim tries to fix the power.  
He has a flashlight like thing that comes from his pak.  
ZIM: I can't seem to find the problem. It looks fine, but why is the power out then?  
ENTITY:HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRGHHHHHHHH!!!  
Zim gets spooked again.  
ZIM: Nyaaahh!! I have to get rid of that thing right now! It sounded like it came from the upper levels.  
Zim goes back to the elevator hole.  
ZIM: C'mon Gir! We'll have to go up like this.  
Gir holds onto Zim's back while continuing to film and Zim manages to climb up with his pak spider legs.  
Gir has never stopped filming.  
They get to the main level of the base.  
ZIM: I need to think of something to do even without the power.  
Steps, growls and whispers are heard.  
ENTITY: I have the body of a pig......  
Zim gets scared once again.  
ZIM: Ngghh! It seemed like it came from that room.  
Zim takes a baseball bat and stays in front of the door gathering courage to enter the room where the sounds came from.  
Gir keeps filming.  
GIR: He goon get ya!  
Zim starts shaking.  
GIR: He's a mean spirit! Yeah ya knooooow!  
Zim keeps shaking even more.  
GIR: He's gonna...!  
ZIM: AH SHUT UP!!  
Zim opens the door but doesn't enter, he looks around until he notices something. It's big, round, wide open eyes with a big smiling open mouth. It's in the corner of the dark room.  
At first the thing is looking at another direction, then looks at another until it finally puts it's eyes on Zim. Zim stares at it confused. The entity gives an even bigger and creepier smile at Zim.  
ZIM: AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!  
Zim closes the door terrified.  
GIR: Is he gonna come out to play?  
ZIM: I don't know what that thing was Gir! But one thing is certain. I've never seen anything like that. What IS THAT?? GIR! STOP PLAYING WITH THAT DAMN CAMERA!  
The base shakes and some pieces of the roof fall on Zim's head.  
ZIM: UGH! That's it! I'll destroy that damn thing!!  
GIR: YAY! EXPLOSIONS!!  
Zim has a couple of laser weapons coming out of his pak. So he goes and looks for the entity.  
He's entering a dark hallway.  
ZIM: Where are you...  
Gir is behind him and, obviously, still filming. Then he notices the entity is above Zim.  
GIR: It's right there!  
ZIM: Where!!? Where!!!!??  
GIR: Right above you!  
ZIM: AAAAHHHHHHH!!!! AAAAAHHHHHH!!!  
Zim shoots at the ceiling. The entity moves.  
GIR: No wait. It's.....  
ZIM: WHERE!!!!?? WHERE!!!!!!!!????  
GIR: Your right!  
ZIM: AAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!  
The entity moves again.  
GIR: Your left!  
ZIM: AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!  
The neighbor next to Zim just sits on his ass, drinking a beer can, while hearing Zim yell and shoot.  
He barely cares.  
ZIM: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!  
There's a pile of concrete the one Zim tries to come out of. Gir is in front of him filming up close.  
GIR: Zoom in, zoom out, zoom in, zoom out.  
ZIM: Gir... get that out of my way.  
Zim gets up and tries to put himself together.  
ZIM: Sigh...  
Zim turns over to Gir who keeps filming him. He has the camera almost sticked to Zim's face.  
Zim throws it to the ground with one slap and starts walking to leave the room. Gir goes to pick up the camera while giving Zim an angry look on his back.  
Zim sneaks sticked to the wall and looking in all directions. He's worried and nervous. He doesn't know what to do.  
Everything is still. Not a soul in sight. He continues to sneak.  
Some loud steps can be heard. Zim stays paralized while sticked to the wall.  
ZIM: Ugh!  
Zim is terrified and wants to peak on a corner. He's sweating and swallows saliva. But in the end he goes for it.  
Once done he founds the entity right in front of his face. This one gives him the same smile it gave him before in the dark room.  
ENTITY: SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS  
Zim runs away terrified and Gir follows with his camera on hand.  
ZIM: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!  
Zim and Gir lock themselves on a small room.  
ZIM: What am I gonna do!? It's some kind of indestructible... species!  
GIR: This is gonna be a great video!  
ZIM: WAIT! I GOT IT! I have in my pak a little device that is sort of like a separate part of the base. I can find information regarding this... thing, using the base computer.  
While he's saying this, Zim takes and works with a little device that he took out of his pak.  
ZIM: There we go.  
COMPUTER: What do you want?  
ZIM: Computer! Quick, there's a monster destroying the base! Threat analysis NOW!!  
COMPUTER: It's a demon. This type of evil entity has been imprisoned for centuries...  
The computer is interrupted by the entity.  
ENTITY: REEEEEEEEEERRRRRRGHHHHHHHHHH!!  
ZIM: How do I destroy it!!??  
COMPUTER: This type of demon cannot be destroyed. It must be sent somewhere else.  
ZIM: I see! BUT HOW!!??  
COMPUTER: You must used whatever contained the spirit to send it away. Put it front of it and with your mind choose wherever you want it to go.  
ZIM: That's it? Then it's already done. C'mon Gir! We need to get back to the lab now! Before it's too late! And get that camera out my face already!!  
Zim and Gir start going to the lab.  
ENTITY: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!  
Zim gets scared again and gets his spider legs from his pak to get to the lab faster. Gir rides on his shoulders.  
ZIM: We need to hurry! There doesn't seem to be much time!!  
Zim and Gir are being persecuted by the entity. Destroying and bringing down parts of the base in front of them to make them trip over and stop them. Zim is worried like hell while Gir just rides on his shoulders.  
ENTITY: RROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!  
The entity is right behind them and gaining up on them.  
GIR: Wow! Look at that!  
Gir zooms in the camera lense on the entity. Then they get to the elevator hole and jump from there.  
Once they're all the way down, Zim closes the door which manages to stop the entity. Though not without making it even angrier. Zim then starts looking for the remains of the ball.  
ZIM: Where is it!?? It's gotta be around here somewhere!! AHA!!  
Zim grabs all the pieces which makes the entire ball come together like before on its own. He's shaking and sweating.  
The entity manages to get in.  
ENTITY: RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!  
Zim, terrified, puts the ball in front of the entity right before this one strikes him. The entity goes nuts all over the place.  
ENTITY:OOOOOOOOOOORRGHHHHHH! RAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRGHHHHHHHHH!! RAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!  
An explosion happens and then the entity disappears. Zim and Gir get up from the floor. Everything is a mess.  
ZIM: It's... over... Finally!  
GIR: Where did the spirit thingy go?  
ZIM: Ah well, I sent it somewhere else like I was supposed to.  
The entity is smiling right in front of Dib's face on his bed. Dib is terrified, shaking and sweating.  
END.

**Author's Note:**

> EASTER EGGS AND REFERENCES:  
> -Paranormal Stupidity: An obvious reference to the Paranormal Activity movies, which inspired the story as well.  
> -"I have the body of a pig": Reference to a famous internet video of an alleged real ghost.


End file.
